Strange cinema 2.

 

Videos of bizarre, funny and sexy scenes from the movies.

 

Historical ponygirl scenes from a strange Czech movie (NSFW).

The 2003 movie Dopisy v krajkách concerns a group of aristocrats from around the time of the French Revolution entertaining themselves by reading some saucy stories. To add to the fun these stories are written on a girl's body so that she has to be undressed for the tales to unfold. These clips are taken from a section telling the tale of Sylvie (Dagmar Ďásková), who is sold to a wealthy fellow who yearns to be the owner of a prize ponygirl. At first Sylvie rebels against her new role but soon acquiesces to become a fine filly who delights her proud owner until he is compelled to hand her over to someone else, leaving the unhappy chap utterly forlorn. I'm sure any one of us would feel devastated if forced to surrender a cherished ponygirl to some dastardly interloper.

 

Something fishy going on (NSFW).

When a group of friends on a sailing holiday are shipwrecked they struggle ashore at an isolated fishing village in the H P Lovecraft inspired movie Dagon. Before long it becomes clear that the locals are in fact a bunch of murderous mutants out for blood and soon the friends are fleeing for their lives as mayhem is unleashed. One of the runaways stumbles into the bedroom of a girl named Uxía (Macarena Gómez) who seems strangely pleased to see him. It starts to look as though this chap might be about to have a rather fun time but in the world of H P Lovecraft tales eldritch terror is never more than a heartbeat away.

 

The invocation of Wile E Coyote (NSFW).

One fine example of strange cinema is the 1971 documentary Secret Rites which follows the doings of self proclaimed king of the witches Alex Sanders and his followers as they go about their neo pagan business. Here is King Alex in the guise of Wile E Coyote, the ancient Egyptian god of unsuccessfully pursuing roadrunners, ably assisted by a bare breasted acolyte who seems to be struggling to take proceedings seriously. Perhaps she is anticipating the moment when the high priest of Wile E launches himself from a giant catapult with risible results. Back in those days Alex and his chums would feature on TV every Halloween so we could enjoy the sight of bare babes prancing about in the nippy autumnal air for the ancient Halloween tradition of Titty Treat; way more fun than Trick or Treat I'm sure you'll agree.

 

Heaven and Hell (NSFW).

The second of the Bohachi Bushido films, The Villain, begins with the execution of the antihero of the movie, Kyushi-Issho (I Die Tomorrow), which you might think would make it a very short feature. However, he awakens to find himself perhaps alive or perhaps dead, maybe in Heaven or maybe in Hell. It surely looks like Heaven to me but you are free to make your own comparisons. There are also a couple of clips from the first film, Code of the Forgotten Eight Virtues, in the Tits of Fury section.

 

School's out for ever.

For as long as there has been an education system the stifling conformity of school life has given rise to numerous acts of teenage rebellion as many of you will doubtless recollect. However, in the 1969 film If... (another fine example of surreal 1960s British cinema) the young antiheroes of the piece allow their pent up resentment of authority to run completely out of control with dire consequences.

 

Shakespeare done right.

I dare say that many of you, like myself, were made to study some play or other by the Immortal Bard (immortal bored more like) during your school days only to find yourself drifting off into a reverie about something more interesting (like watching paint dry, for instance). In the 1993 film Last Action Hero one young Arnold Schwarzenegger fan imagines what Hamlet would be like if his idol was in the leading role. It looks like a huge improvement to me.

 

Strange invention.

Many people seem to think that Germans are so obsessed with hard work and efficiency that they never find time for any sort of fun or frivolity. By way of countering that blinkered stereotype here is a clip from the 1985 film Gritta von Rattenzuhausbeiuns (Gritta of Rats in the House By Us) in which the young heroine of the title (played by Nadja Klier) lives in a ramshackle rat infested castle with her eccentric inventor father and faithful old family retainer Gebhardt. As the film unfolds she becomes embroiled in all manner of strange adventures such as being a test pilot for her dad's anti assassination ejector throne which he is hoping to present to the king and so make his fortune.

 

The Fourth Reich?

In the 1970s nothing was considered too tasteless to be made into a motion picture. To demonstrate, here is a clip from the 1975 blacksploitation Nazisploitation crossover The Black Gestapo in which loose cannon human rights activist Colonel Kojah sets up a private army to protect his community from some unsavoury Mafia types. Unfortunately he soon succumbs to megalomania and his troops turn from protectors to oppressors. Here he is addressing a rally of his loyal followers.

 

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